Tonight's insomnia doesn't come with Russian nesting dolls and imaginary boxes filled with fantasy. I guess that only happens when I wake up in the middle of the night after a few hours sleep.
Tonight's insomnia where I can't ever fall asleep to begin with because my mind is so full of the stress of the day and the dread of the back-to-back-to-back-to-back meetings in the morning, punctuated only with what will be an unpleasant encounter with a disgruntled employee with a sour personality.
With this kind of insomnia, when I stop the cycle of personal anxiety thoughts, I think about:
Israeli assassination of Iranian nuclear scientists,
Iranian retaliation for assassinations of their nuclear scientists,
Republican control of the US and criminalizing birth control,
Scott Walker diverting funds that are intended for people with foreclosed homes in order to fill budget deficits caused by giving tax breaks to people who by no stretch have foreclosed homes,
getting a lingering and fatal illness in which I cannot care for myself so I have to drag my sick butt home to be cared for by my mom or sister because I'm all alone,
is my eye just sore because I am now so tired and keep rubbing it, or, do I have pink-eye?
Good times in my bedroom tonight.
I thought about making a blog post in my other blog, but that would require a bit of thought and either my scanner or camera. Too much effort for the amount of energy I've got. Not to mention I want to leave writing in that blog as a source of joy and creativity. I'll leave that for another day.
This kind of insomnia reminds me of a decade, no closer to 15 years or so ago, when I had bouts and listened to Flying Saucer Attack and Low I Could Live in Hope at night a lot.
