Memory Lane is Ugly

A Facebook post about a bar burning in Hamtramck led to conversation about a bar closing in Denver and me remembering this photo of a different bar. I didn't remember anything about this photo but a couple other people did and, of course, the memories are not flattering to me. The guy is Rick, a friend/roommate, and the half-butt is me in 1996.

Blech.
I hated that time in my life and just thinking about it makes me feel kind of creepy.

That time makes me think of drinking too much, not eating enough other than cheeseburgers at a stinky bar and then giant breakfast burritos at a hangover diner, trying to fit in with people with whom I was never going to fit and who didn't really like me very much. And Niandra Lades and Usually Just a T-shirt, Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness, Jon Spencer Blues Explosion Extra Width and Chocolate and Cheese.

On the brights side, I think that is about the last time I was close to the weight I'd like to be. I could wear those two beautiful dresses I bought in San Francisco Chinatown if I was that size again.

1995

For several months in 1995, I lived in a really crummy apartment with two guys, a doberman, the ugliest yellow stucco walls, and million cockroaches. We didn't have many CDs and every now and again, I'll hear a song and be transported back to those months and the music we listened to over and over. Ween's Voodoo Lady and I'm right back there remembering the good times. Anything from Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness and I feel trapped, miserable and like I have a Jagermeister hang-over again. Or maybe everyone feels that way when listening to that album?

One album though, while I rarely listen to it, often comes to mind when I feel like someone is invading my personal space. In addition to the ugly walls and cockroaches, we also had an annoying landlord. He took forever to unclog a sink or fix a toilet and always made a point to snoop around when he was there. One day when he was over doing something or another, I decided the best way to make him want to leave as soon as possible was to put on John Frusciante.